A Dodgy Dating Story

Those of you who know me a while, or have followed my tumblr or blog for a spell, will know that I have had terrible, TERRIBLE, luck when it comes to matters of the heart.
It’s not just when I get a man that I have bad luck. I seem to always get into horrible and embarrassing spots of bother whenever I am around any male person. I am just cursed to be awkward and alone. I mean it.
Like this one time I was on a date in a quiet pub and we were having a nice time and were sitting down chatting when these drunk Dublin oul lads sat beside us. Now I chose this bar because it was always quiet and empty and chilled and full of hip young thangs and spanish tourists. Anyway these lads sat down and then asked us how long we had been dating. I chose to just look at them whereas The Boy said it was our first date… This led to a lot of me being told The Boy was a gent and that I was a beautiful girl, the oul lad said fella the first time but sure, and that we would have beautiful babies.
Beautiful fucking babies? We haven’t even had our first kiss man. 
I get so awkward in these situations that I just sat there awkwardly grimacing. That’s not so bad one might say…
But that was the night water dropped in my eye and it got infected. I had a red eye for days after. When it dropped in my eye one eye closed and the other started watering. That was the most awkward goodbye of my life. Especially as I fell getting on the bus.
Any embarrassing date stories from you guys? Email me them (chaneylynnjo@gmail.com) with the subject line “Dodgy Dating Story” and I will post my favourite ones. If I feel your story is especially pathetic I might send you a pity prize to help you on your next date.
Do you guys prefer these kind of posts or would you like me to stick to hair and make up?
Let me know in the comments or by email.
Happy 2014.
Lynn Jo xox 

Christmas Time

Merry Christmas EVERYONE.
So I’ve just decided I’m going to do a nice wee reflection post on the past year and that.
But first let me start by wishing you and yours a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I hope you all have a ball and are spoilt and got exactly what you wished for. I also hope 2014 brings everything you want and hope for and more. 
2013 wasn’t a great year for me for the most part in a lot of aspects. Things went wrong and everything got a bit shit. Then it all started to get better and things turned around.
2014 may get off to a bad start because I will be finishing up in the best job I’ve ever had. But that’s okay. It can only go up from there. 
I’ve had an amazing year and met some of my favourite people in this time. There are four girls who have been there for me during everything and kept me on the straight and narrow as well as figuring out what I wanted to do in life. When the people I thought were my friends weren’t there these girls were. They showed me nights out, good times in work, nice nights out at concerts and lovely motivational talks. They are my cousin, my class mate, my work mate and my goth gal. Without them 2013 wouldn’t have ended on such a high and I am so glad to have them in my life.

Next year is gonna be my year.

Lynn Jo xox

Indie Spice | Review

Last week was my unofficial work party, the big one is in January, and we went out for a lovely meal in Swords.
The ladies of the store chose to go to Indie Spice for dinner, an Indian restaurant in Swords Village. Now I have never, ever had Indian food before and you do hear stories of Indian food going straight through people so I was quite nervous. I was also kinda scared that I  wouldn’t know what to get to eat. They had the menu in work a few days before hand so we could have a wee look at it so that wasn’t too bad. I’d been shopping with my mum the day before and she bought Tikka Masala for us to have during the week so I went with that.
When we got there it turned out we had a different menu in work than the one we were paying for. So we requested that menu and boy was there much more choice on it. I just went for Onion Bhajee as my started and then my Tikka Masala. It was actually so nice. Onion Bhajees in my opinion are nice crispy onions and they were so delish. As for the Tikka Massala, it was sooooo good but I just couldn’t finish it because I was so hungry when I got to the restaurant and filled up on poppadoms (which were so good). When we were served our meal we got some potatoes and spinach which were a nice addition as well as the basmati pilau rice. The dessert options were Baileys cheesecake or vanilla ice cream. I don’t like cheesecake so I went for the ice cream which was yummy. Why is it ice cream in a restaurant is always better than anything you buy in the shops? Our ice cream had a long stalk of brown spaghetti sticking out of it… now that I didn’t quite understand.
Some of the ladies got Baileys or Vodka after the meal. I kinda tuned out for that bit but I think it may have been complimentary. 
But anyway all that was €29.95,
I also had a Long Island Iced Tea which cost me €7.95.
I must say it’s a long time since I’ve ever been at a restaurant where the staff were so polite and obliging AND the food being so good at the same time. I’m already looking forward to going back. 
What restaurants have you been to that you suprisingly loved?
Let me know in the comments.
All my love,
Lynn Jo xox 

My First Kiss | Cringe Alert

So as usual I was moaning about how desperately alone I am, and the shit luck I have with the male sex, when the wonderful Brian from www.briantellsstories.com told me I should blog more about dating and my experiences with guys. Now I know I told ya’ll that I was done talking about guys and relationships on the blog because they never work out. But there is no reason I can’t talk about experiences that happened in the past… right? As Brian said, the world wants “gossip and juice” so I am gonna give it to you. 
Here is the story of my first kiss.
(apologies to the poor lad who features in this, I really hope you never see this)
Okay so I have told you all about the Gaeltacht before. For those of you who don’t know it is basically where Irish kids go to the most cut off and remote locations in the West of Ireland to spend an intense three weeks learning Irish. We all bond and speak Irish constantly and do activities and it is actually a great laugh. I’d imagine, that like me, most Irish teenagers who went to the Gaeltacht would have had their first kiss there.
Mine was with a guy called Niall. Niall was lovely. I don’t remember fancying him throughout the course of the three weeks we were in the Gaeltacht, but I did think he looked like Draco Malfoy so that led me to have a slight thing for him. For some reason I did tell him he looked like Draco Malfoy (he really didn’t bar the slicked back blonde hair).
On our second last night in the Gaeltacht we had the luxury of going to the cinema. This was Niall’s last night there as he would be leaving the next morning, a day early, to go away or something. At this stage we were already a thing(so to speak) or else everyone knew I liked him so naturally I was made to sit beside him. I was very embarrassed and shy. I don’t like that kind of attention. 
Oh you’ll never guess what movie we went to see. Yeah you guessed it. It was Harry Potter. Chamber of Secrets I want to say but I may be wrong. Anyway Niall got his arm around me. Then whispered in my ear, “This one’s for Draco” and proceeded to make his move. I’ll spare you all the gory deets but it was horrible. 13/14 year old me was traumatized. My face was really wet after. I’m pretty sure I kissed no one else for like a year after as a result. 
But yeah. There we go. Sorry Niall but it was a terrible kiss and you didn’t look like Draco. We did stay a couple for like a month after though even though he lived in like Sligo and I lived in Dublin. Ah sure.
What past relationship stories would you lot like to hear? Let me know in the comments below.
Also send me in your first kiss stories. I will share my top 5 and might even send a prize to my favourite, just to make it all better.
All my love,
Lynn Jo. xox