Those of you who know me a while, or have followed my tumblr or blog for a spell, will know that I have had terrible, TERRIBLE, luck when it comes to matters of the heart.
It’s not just when I get a man that I have bad luck. I seem to always get into horrible and embarrassing spots of bother whenever I am around any male person. I am just cursed to be awkward and alone. I mean it.
Like this one time I was on a date in a quiet pub and we were having a nice time and were sitting down chatting when these drunk Dublin oul lads sat beside us. Now I chose this bar because it was always quiet and empty and chilled and full of hip young thangs and spanish tourists. Anyway these lads sat down and then asked us how long we had been dating. I chose to just look at them whereas The Boy said it was our first date… This led to a lot of me being told The Boy was a gent and that I was a beautiful girl, the oul lad said fella the first time but sure, and that we would have beautiful babies.
Beautiful fucking babies? We haven’t even had our first kiss man.
I get so awkward in these situations that I just sat there awkwardly grimacing. That’s not so bad one might say…
But that was the night water dropped in my eye and it got infected. I had a red eye for days after. When it dropped in my eye one eye closed and the other started watering. That was the most awkward goodbye of my life. Especially as I fell getting on the bus.
Any embarrassing date stories from you guys? Email me them (firstname.lastname@example.org) with the subject line “Dodgy Dating Story” and I will post my favourite ones. If I feel your story is especially pathetic I might send you a pity prize to help you on your next date.
Do you guys prefer these kind of posts or would you like me to stick to hair and make up?
Let me know in the comments or by email.
Lynn Jo xox